I feel like talking about today, even though I still am behind on my study timetable and felt rather guilty after Eujin’s observation that “eh you’re actually quite slack huh” (compared to my coursemates) because beyond all protestations to the contrary, I know it to be true. eeps.
Anyway, Easter Sunday was beautiful! “See, what a morning, gloriously bright!”, as befits a joyous day of remembrance such as this. And, All Souls really truly resounded with such joyous “A-a-a-a-a-lleluia!”s (I found out later from Pingkhuan in the states that he sang that hymn in church, and so did Peiyong back in Singapore, and the thought that people all over the world were singing today made me very very glad!) Also, sitting upstairs in the gallery and watching John Stott (or as Rico Tice says, “Uncle John” which he really is anyway if we’re all in the same family!) walk up to read the Bible was strangely touching. He used a walking stick and was supported by a younger man, but his steps though slow were steady just as his voice though old was strong and clear, just as he has through the years stood steadfastly in Christ.
Regent’s Park was really beautiful too, as it always is this time of year. It was lovely just eating, talking, and enjoying sunshine and fresh air with Dot. Though we flattened much grass where we sat, and I forgot to photograph flowers as I intended to, and couldn’t bear to take books out to study. Haha. Headed home fully intending to start studying but instead had more good conversation (not complaining) with Tien over a packet of greasy chips from the neighbourhood fish and chips bar (haiyah).
After all that talking, I went back into my room and started thinking (not about environmental economics which I should have been unfortunately) about my view on romantic relationships, and rewind a few years, how different it was then. And I recalled how in the months after the break-up, I kind of committed myself to a season of celibacy (yes possibly from reading the article haha). Thinking about it now though, I would like to commit again to being, to quote the writer, “temporarily celibate – not available to men until further notice from God” haha. Ok I laugh, but I say it all seriousness still. I want to make the most of this season, not worry about the future, not complain about men, to live vividly while I’m not tied to any single person, to seize the opportunity, throw open my arms and embrace the whole world! Does that sounds silly? I’m serious though don’t laugh! But I know it’ll take surrendering, of desires and needs to the One who knows them best, trusting in His time. And I can do that because He lived and died and rose again! Happy Easter!
Our hearts were made for You, O Lord
And they are restless until they rest in You.
- Saint Augustine
